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When an Idiot Tries to Level You Down

By on August 12, 2018
crystal

By Crystal Andrus Morissette

I just got home from the most beautiful getaway with my husband at Niagara-on-the-lake to celebrate our ten-year wedding anniversary. And although everything was sheer perfection, I have to tell you a little story that could have set me back, taken away my power, and made me feel dumb.

***

After two days of nothing but love, love, and more love, LOL, and oh, great food (I mean … great food, 5-star dining), delicious wine, an incredible hotel, a king size bed that you want to sleep in forever, and oh, the service, the spa . . . ahahahahaha.

On our final evening, we decided to go down to the pool area. We’d had a lovely dinner and wanted to finish off with a nightcap and a jacuzzi. We bundled up in our luxurious white robes, bathing suits underneath, and headed to the outdoor patio which has a spectacular waterfall to sit beside.

Out we went, a glass of wine in hand, sitting under the stars, quietly chatting. The patio is small, very private and no one else was outside. We felt like the most blessed couple on Earth.

That’s when another couple came out, they said, just to check things out. We smiled and made small talk for a few minutes and that’s when my husband told them we are celebrating our 10-year anniversary.

The guy (yes, ‘guy’ and not gentleman) says, “There is no way you two have been married for ten years. Maybe, you’ve dated for two months!”

We laughed.

“Nope. We’ve definitely been married for ten years,” I said.

And that’s when the drunken goofball said one of those comments I’ve come to learn over the years that only get said by men who feel insecure and so they try to ‘level you’ by making you feel smaller.

“How could you possibly have stuck it out with her for ten years?” he asked my husband. As he gave me a dirty look.
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He thought he was funny.
.
I wondered, “What the heck could I possibly have done for him to say that about me?”
.
He said a few more ‘funny’ comments about how in love we still looked and he just couldn’t believe we’d actually been together that long.

He then asked us to come back up to his room with him and his wife for a second nightcap.

My husband immediately declined and explained that we weren’t swingers with a laugh.

His wife got angry with him. And stormed away. By the way, she was beautiful.

>>> Way out of his league!

He laughed. I actually thought he thought he was going to stay and hang out with us!

I told him he should go follow her now. Quickly.

“Go. You’re in a gorgeous hotel. Don’t ruin your night. Go follow her.”

I literally said, “Go!”

He jumped up and ran off.

***

Thank God! The whole exchange was no more than fifteen minutes. Fifteen minutes that could have poo-pooed my last night in paradise.

But there was no way he could ruin our night. Not for a second. I wouldn’t allow for it. Nor would my husband. We were in love, solid, and steady. We stayed that way.

As I look at the photo my husband took of me sitting out there on the patio, I see how peaceful, content, and loving I looked.

There was NOTHING that should have given any human being the indication that it was appropriate to say “I would be a hard woman to live with for ten years” – especially, from a man who is staying in a 5-star hotel, with his own woman, while we are quietly minding our business.

The good news, I finally got it.

I mean really get it.

Over the years, I’ve had a good handful or two of men that for no reason would dismiss me, shame me, belittle me, judge me, or make rude comments.

But I get it now.

My energy is too much for some people. My energy has been too much for some people since I was four-years-old. At least that’s the time I first remember an aunt being really mean to me.

Maybe you’ve experienced something similar:

  •  A certain family member who puts you down at every get-together? (Jealous)
  • A co-worker who tries to ‘level’ you and to make you feel less valued at your company? (Insecure)
  • Maybe it’s even a partner who rarely compliments you or who holds back affection or sex just so you feel less than, less sexy, less beautiful, less than you really are? (Controlling)

Behavior like this is NEVER ABOUT YOU. The lesson, however, is about you!

This is YOUR opportunity to realize that only you can decide what you believe about yourself, how you talk to yourself, and how you allow others to treat you.

Only you can drill into your own head that you are ENOUGH!

You are loveable (too lovable for some jealous, insecure idiot, that’s for sure!).

You are perfect exactly as you are and you will find someone who praises, celebrates, and most of all, SEES YOU for who you really are and treats you properly!

But this can only happen once you SEE yourself!

I’ve realized that it doesn’t matter if I’m quietly cuddled up in a luxurious robe sipping a glass of wine at 11 pm with my husband on a quiet, private patio, or if I’m laughing really loud at a baseball game, there are some men who just can’t handle me.

I won’t change me to fit them.

Somethings JUST DON’T FIT. 😉

If you need help learning how to reclaim your greatness, I’d like to show you something I’m teaching in September that even OPRAH has featured three times: www.swatinstitute.com/course/12-week/

It’s time we women realize how fabulous we really are.

Love,
Crystal

XOX

P.S. This is the picture of me from the night the goofball told my husband I would be way too hard to live with. ahahahhahah

********

Crystal Andrus Morissette, Founder

CrystalFounder2

From life as a homeless teen to coaching A-List celebrities, from having abs of steel and the Miss Galaxy to weighing over 200 pounds after having babies, Emotional Age and Communication Expert Crystal Andrus Morissette is a worldwide leader in the field of self-discovery and personal transformation. A media darling, she has been featured numerous times on Oprah.com, the New York Post, Fox TV, the Daily Mail, CBS Radio, CTV, CityTV, Global TV, Slice TV, the Globe and Mail, and the Toronto Star. Crystal is the founder of the S.W.A.T. Institute (Simply Woman Accredited Trainer), an empowerment coach certification exclusively for women that she created with fellow female visionaries Louise Hay, Marianne Williamson, Dr Christiane Northrup, Colette Baron-Reid, and Sandra Anne Taylor among others. Established in 2009, the S.W.A.T. Institute is now in over 30 countries.

Crystal is the author of five best-selling books, including her latest release entitled, “Simply…Woman: Stories from 30 magnificent women who have risen against the odds!” She is also certified in nutrition, sports medicine, and yoga.

Crystal’s message of resilience, strength, and inner power has allowed her to grace the stage with speakers such as Dr. Phil, Dr. Wayne Dyer, Naomi Judd, Suze Orman, Marianne Williamson, Louise Hay, Dr. Christiane Northrup, Dr. Joan Borysenko, Debbie Ford, Sarah Ferguson—Duchess of York, and many more. Crystal has coached women from all walks of life including A-list celebrities, best-selling authors, scientists, doctors, dentists, and lawyers to stay-at-home moms and struggling teens. Her passion is to get down in the trenches and help people become the (s)heroes of their own lives.

www.crystalandrusmorissette.com | www.swatinstitute.com | www.SimplyWomanBook.com | www.SimplyWoman.com | www.SimplyWomanSummit.

 

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