You Are Not Where You Are by Accident

I went to the wake to be with my chiropractor’s family as they grieved the loss of their father, husband, brother, uncle, Dr. Orest Jakym.

And I’m so glad I went.

We are not meant to do grief—or life—alone.
We are meant to hug.
To commiserate.
To remember.
To celebrate.
Together.

I won’t lie—I’m a private person. I genuinely find comfort being alone in my home. I have my husband, my daughters, my granddaughter who occupy about 90 percent of my time (and heart) lol.

And yet… the women I have chosen—and who choose me—matter deeply.

Even when much of that connection happens online.
They are my people.
From all over the world.

Lately, I’ve found myself reflecting a lot.
Maybe too much.

On my past.
On the why.

Why they did what they did.
Why I chose what I chose.

I think part of me is trying to understand how I arrived here—
In this home.
With these people.
These animals.
These birds.

And then I realize:

I chose all of it.
And here we are.
Doing this thing called life together.

I chose my chiropractor of all the healers.
I chose my husband of all the men.
I choose my daughters over and over and over again.
I chose this house.
I choose to stay here.

Understanding the past can help us make some sense of things—but it will never explain the billions… trillions… of tiny moments, decisions, turns, pauses, and pivots that brought each of us to right here.

Right now.
You reading these words.
Me somehow being part of your life.

Out of 8 billion people on this planet, we found our way to each other.

Life is made of choices—whether we realize we’re making them or not—every single second.
Who to love.
How to feel.
What to eat.
What to think about.
What to watch.
What to listen to.
What to read.

Every choice holds duality.
This way or that way.

Most of them were unconscious, and yet the brain was working overtime in every single one.

Why these people?
Why this cat?
Why these birds?
Why this home, these neighbors, this community?

We will never fully know why.

But we can become conscious of what comes next.

Time waits for no one.

And I want to be present for every lasting second of it.

I want to milk every bit of juice out of this—
This moment.
This life.
This here.

Not convincing myself that “out there” holds something better than “right here.”

Because it’s all the same.
It’s all happening inside of you.

And this…
This is the choice I’m making now.
You, too, get to choose and are choosing.
Every. Single. Moment.

Love,
Crystal

Continue the Journey
Read last week’s Sunday Reflection:
[On Time, Loss, and Being Held] →